Let’s stand up and be counted, shall we? How many of us lie to our personalities, aren’t true to our own true selves? Especially those of us with a first impression to make? I want to say I’m honest when it comes to the first 30 seconds of “nice to meet you” but, then again there isn’t much to lie about. I speak my mind. I will tell you how I feel, what I believe in (or not). I can be “in your face” with my opinions. I will love you forever or walk away. I can’t come off any smarter, prettier, funnier so what’s the point in trying? What you see is what you get. What I hide is insecurity, self-doubt and the amazing ability to sell myself short. I’ve got it down to an art. But, even that doesn’t stay hidden forever. That truth will surface sooner or later. No lying.
As for others, I love people who say “I can respect that” and mean it, really mean it. The people who say with all honesty, “I see what you are saying.” Does that sound familiar, kisa? It’s like they are the people with ability to see the glass from every direction. They walk around it, circle it, inspecting all the facts, and weighing the opinions of half full and half empty and, in the end, despite disagreeing, still say, “I can respect that.” What they are really saying is I don’t agree with you but I won’t hold that against you. It is the attitude of come as you are. So appealing, so attractive, so impressive. Here’s the deal. I’m learning to walk around the glass. I’m learning to see the invisible angles. I see what you’re saying.
Come as you are, but let me be me if that’s what you really, truly preach. No lying. I now walk away.
Edited to add: There are times when I get freaked out by coincidences – especially those involving complete strangers. I consider Stephanie a complete stranger yet I read her blog pretty religiously. We share the same viewpoints on food and the food network, friends…stuff like that. So, imagine my surprise when she blogged about “to each his own” yesterday. She even says, “it’s why Baskin’ Robbins has 31 flavors” (I love the way she writes, by the way). Coincidentally (again), I should have written mine yesterday, but I took some advice and slept on it. Okay, so Stephanie delves into a topic I could never think about much less write about (swinging), but you get the point. Variety is the spice of life…and…to each his (or HER) own! Rock on, Steph! Thank you for putting it into words much better than my own.
~*LunaSea*~ 
I like this post! I can relate to it. Being raised by a very judgemental woman, it is hard to not fall into that template of constant judgement of others. After all, I grew up surrounded by her words, and you learn what you live. So, every day I work hard to listen … to REALLY listen to people when they talk. To hear not only the words they say, but hear the things they do not say. I remind myself not to judge them for their words and thoughts. And I try to respond to them from a place of kindness and healing. Sure, I still have my moments … I can be sarcastic, I can be judgemental, I blurt things out without thinking, and I sometimes talk over people and finish their thoughts for them (only I finish them with my thoughts). But every day I work on it, and every day I go to bed a different person than when I woke up (even if it’s only a tiny bit different).
So, I stand up and enthusistically applaud you on learning how to walk around the glass. To change your thinking is a grand challenge. But you are always up for a good challenge, now aren’t you?
🙂
Thank you! I think we ALL are like that to a certain degree. Listening is an art and hearing what isn’t said is a grace. I really, really like the idea of going to bed a different person from than when you woke up. It’s a beautiful image.
RE: 1st impressions…I think I do them well. I think I do them too well, sometimes. the me who likes to sit at home sometimes on friday night and not bother with anyone is nowhere near my first impression…not in the same universe. my first impression has every single reaction, every single quip, available seamlessly on the tip of the tongue…at least my first impression lately.
my first impression is a charmer, more than anything else. and that’s certainly a BIG part of me. but it’s only part of me, and there are many parts. some that seem rather surprising after meeting my first impression.
I would definitely agree with that. My 1st impression of you was exactly that – someone who loves to be the life of the party. Now that I know you better I can picture you staying home and not bothering with anyone. BUT, I never would have thought that when I first met you.
Oh well, at least I know myself, eh?
and my first impression self is the reason that I make friends everywhere I go…on vacation, at school, at concerts…standing on line for a comedy show…so I definitely wouldn’t change it for anything. it’s just funny how little I feel like that sometimes.
I hear ya! 🙂