Spoon

I’m functioning on a little over three hours of sleep and my brain seems to be fixated on fukcing spoons. I just want a clean nonplastic, I repeat – clean spoon. One spoon. One that doesn’t have little curly cues of plastic shavings around the edges; one that doesn’t have dried crude on the handle, water spots, coffee stains, or sharp edges from being chewed up in the garbage disposal. We don’t even have a garbage disposal so I’m not sure what’s up with that. I just know it looks more like a weapon than something I’d want to put in my mouth. I’ve scoured the staff kitchen with little luck. All I need is a utensil with which to eat my yogurt before it starts doing the creepy crawly across my desk. Is that too much to ask? I would really like to enjoy my blackberry parfait before the word culture takes on a whole new meaning. It’s been over an hour. Maybe I can use a straw? Damn spoon.