Strengths in Numbers

There is truth to what they say…that whole strength in numbers thing. I believe in it…to an extent (I guess in my life there is room for doubt..about everything). But, this numbers thing is onto something. Originally, I was planning on going to sirsy with only me and myself. I miss the music, I need the music, even if Nobody misses or needs me. By my lonesome I was prepared to be alone – r e a l l y alone. It’s not a feeling I am stranger to. I have felt alone in a crowded room, and for some reason, liked it. Almost anonymous, sitting outside the hub of activity. Observing from the fringes. That’s how I prepared to be tonight…but, I’ll be honest, I didn’t think I’d like it because it’s not the same. Self imposed isolation is different from someone doing it for you.

I never used to be this way. I once went to Albany for a Leukemia & Lymphoma charity event. I went teamless. I didn’t know a soul except for the music. I was there to heal my soul with the music. You talk about cancer. You worry about cancer. You rant about cancer. Sometimes it’s the tiny things like good music that can take the talk, worry, and rant all away…for a little while. That was why I drove to Albany alone. To heal with music ~ for the moment. I wasn’t afraid. I am now. I don’t think I could do that today. My courage needs a team these days.

So, J, G, D, W, C & D – I will see you from the fringe.

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