Snarling Day

I should have been listening to Sean Rowe’s Wrong Side of the Bed because that was me yesterday. I think I said it more than thrice, this thing is bigger than a bed – I got up on the wrong side of life yesterday. Where, on this map of negative, do I start? If I had written this in the midst of my mindless rage I would have ranted incoherently. I barely remember the phone conversation I had with one of my oldest friends. I felt out of control, swerving off sanity and veering into trouble, dangerously close to a nervous breakdown lane. Choking back tears I couldn’t find clarity. A real crack up.

Work has never had me as frustrated as now. People breaking down, barely held together with kind words and calls to 911. Complaints about the heat are followed by silence when something was finally done. When the head of maintenance asked for feedback it was all I could do but shrug. No news is good news, I guess. I won’t share the new complaints. Why bring his day down to my level?

There’s more. My car. My future. My family. It seems to be all about me, myself and moi these days. I think when you sink this low it’s hard to see anything but what hurts.


6 Comments on “Snarling Day”

  1. Ruth says:

    You know what kid, sometimes it just HAS to be all about you. Keep an eye out for the good things (no matter how small) and draw strength from there. Set side the issues that are clearly not your own because they will only tap your spirit dry. Do what you can for what is closest to your heart right now, you energy is best spent there. You WILL muddle through this tough moment in life and you will be better once you get to the other side. I have absolute faith in that (and in you). And if all else fail – you know where to find me 🙂

  2. gr4c5 says:

    Wish I found you last night – know that scene in Tommy Boy when Tommy says he wants to turn the wheel into a guard rail? I was there. Was I ever!

    ps~ this “snow” freaks me out!

  3. Ruth says:

    Well, I am glad you didn’t turn the wheel! 🙂

    The “snow” is a bit odd, but once you get used to it … it’s kind of peaceful.

  4. gr4c5 says:

    hmmm…peaceful. That’s one way to look at it!

    BTW: I’m getting over the house…and everything else. thanks for listening.

  5. sarah says:

    i’m having tech difficulties right now…so i hope this doesn’t post 5 times.

    (((HUGS))) call me if there is anything i can do to help

  6. gr4c5 says:

    thanks sarah! I’m doing much, much better. Last night was the worst of it, I hope! I’ll call you! xoxox


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