Category: Good

March Was…

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March was a disaster for reading. Despite spring break and Easter both in this month I really didn’t get a lot of time to really read. Kisa and I had to take separate cars a few times to work, we had a trip to Maine, I didn’t make any super-long-cook meals, kisa didn’t play any super-long video games or get sucked into super-long boreMEtotears movies, and almost every night I preferred sleep over putting words and sentences together. But, for a month of “not” reading I think I did okay:

For LibraryThing: Wrack & Ruin by Don Lee

For BookLust:
Carter Clay by Elizabeth Evans
Dalva by Jim Harrison
Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
Continental Drift by Russell Banks
Three Roads to the Alamo by William C. Davis (started by didn’t get through).

An extra: Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger

So, I got to everything I said that I would. I think I should get bonus points for attempted a nearly 800 page book so late in the month! My favorite was Continental Drift by Russell Banks. I still think it should be a movie.
Next month I have two LibraryThing books – one fiction and one nonfiction. I’m looking forward to them.

Not Just Anyone

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paint it blackYou know that feeling when someone does something and you see it one way and that someone else sees it another? There is that weird disconnect between It Means A Lot and It’s No Big Deal? All night long I was stuck in the land of limbo.
First there was my JustFries man, making the trip to come hang out with me. Me, myself & moi! I invited. He accepted. Just like that. It was cool. When I thanked him for coming (because it meant a lot) he shrugged (like it was no big deal). No, really. It meant a lot. I want to join the Revolution and see you soon.
Then, there was the band. They weren’t even supposed to play. So what? I had driven over 2 hours to see them. So what? They didn’t owe silly me a performance. They could have turned around and driven back to wherever saying sorry! Your loss! Better luck next time! But, they found a place to play. And play they did. I loved Breakdown and Sympathy. They probably didn’t even get paid for their efforts but, but! But, they played as if they were each getting a cool mil. It was priceless to me.
Finally there was MrMissYou. My highlight of the night. I would have driven three times as far to hear a dedication like that. It may have meant nothing to you, but it meant the world to me.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that in the company of amazing people I find myself thinking I’m not just anyone. It’s no big deal to you or you or you, but it means everything to me.

There was only one other person I really missed that night. Maybe next time?

Beatles Sex or Celine?

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Las VegasI can’t decide. My choices are, but are not limited to: The Beatles, Zoomanity, Celine Dion, Wayne Brady, tigers…and some burlesque thing. At least that’s what I’ve found so far while researching things to do…other than gamble…in Vegas. Here’s the thing. We’re planning our Nevada/Utah,/Arizona/California trip and I want to make the most of everything everywhere. We’re giving Vegas only two days. So, that means cramming a lot into a little time. Definitely a show in Vegas, maybe 10 minutes of gambling (just to say I did it), and who knows what else. I am a virgin when it comes to Vegas. Sooo “skies the limit” as they say. To say that I want to experience it all doesn’t mean I want to find a prostitute…and I was only kidding about Celine Dion. She is not an option. Neither is Wayne Brady. But, I do know there is a wealth of fun in Vegas. After all, someone had to have coined the phrase “what happens in Vegas…” for a reason. Right?
This is what I know I want to do in Vegas: skinny dip in the pool, find a turtle in the wilderness sanctuary, have a cheeseburger in paradise, do that 10 minutes of gambling I mentioned, have a dirty martini, see a CirqueDuSoleil show (sex or Beatles? I can’t decide!), find evidence of Bugsy’s vision (at the Flamingo), maybe get a new tat, and finally, last but not least, find a diner that serves huevos rancheros at 3am. That’s pretty tame for what I could want. I know I know! But, it’s a start. Right?

Party for Anne

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I feel like we should throw a party for Anne…or something. Her NotAreview blog has been viewed over 2,000 times. I know I’ve asked what’s with Anne? in the past, but now I’m thrilled. Anne deserves all the attention she can get!

Beating Up Bill

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I woke to rain and rolled my eyes. Of course it was raining. Of course. Today was race day. I had to run…and it was raining. At that point I wanted nothing more than to snuggle deeper under the covers and pretend I had a few more hours of snoozetime. It’s hard to take a stand when all you want is to let sleeping dogs lie. *sigh*
The park was buzzing with ipods and lycra tights. Stretching, jumping, running in place, people talking the talk of runners. PRs, last races, and strained hamstrings. Water, bananas and bagels. I got #779 and tried to figure out what happened in July 1979 that was good. Looking for an omen. Killing time with idle chatter to calm less than idle nerves. I heard a rumor the run was twice around the park. If memory serves me right, the park is only 1.1 miles around. Hmm? I anticipated a creative run…to say the least. At least it stopped raining.
Here’s what I forgot about running outside: Hills – up and down ones, gradual and steep ones. I wasn’t used to running down Duck Pond Hill. Weird on the knees. Gusts of wind. Cold wind. Patches of ice. Large puddles of really cold, dirty water. Larger than life piles of dog sh!t. I encountered all of it with shock and amusement. Ran right through all of it without prejudice. Baseball cap pulled low, low, low. Eyes on my feet the entire time. When I got to That Spot I cursed it. Fukc you and your pain. Even spit on it the second time around. Yes, even spit on it.
The creative addition to 2.2 miles? Running in a circle in the train station parking lot. I knew it would be different!
We finished running up Hell Hill. This, I’m used to it. It’s the only way out of the park, the only way home. I’ve done it a thousand times. Grind my teeth, focus on the feet and dig in. I found power and surged to the finish line. Before ‘These Are Days’ could get a minute of music, I finished. Technically, I finished on ‘Paint it Black’ – two songs earlier than I planned. I don’t have the official time, but I do know this, I officially finished. Beating up Bill never felt so good.

Bill’s Challenge Playlist:

  • Hotel California
  • We Didn’t Start The Fire
  • We’re Not Gonna Take It
  • Higher Ground
  • All My Life (kisa’s spur of the moment pick)
  • Lose Yourself
  • Paint It Black
  • These Are Days (didn’t hear)
  • The Scientist (didn’t hear)

Thanks 2 U

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musicIt’s the day before my first BackInTheSaddle race. A little 5k-er…in the snow (at least that’s what the forecast was predicting). I’m a little nervous. It’s o n l y 5k, but still…This marks the beginning of my road back to the run. Mentally, it’s a big, huge, colossal deal for me. Mentally, it’s all that I have. Having said all that, I think conditions are perfect. The race is in the same park where I trained for the half. I know it intimately. I love it well. Friends have gotten married there. I’ve seen Natalie perform there. I have so much history there…it’s also the same place where I first felt my knee give out. It’s where I fell to the ground. I know the exact piece of pavement I crumpled on. Half of me prays we avoid that spot altogether, but other other half wants to run over that exact spot with a fukc you vengeance, stomp on that spot…and keep going.

I asked people for input on favorite songs. I made it obvious that I want to make each list into a special mix just for that person, but what I didn’t make clear is that I want to take certain songs from each list and create my very first race mix. Two people emailed me privately with their choices, someone else sent me a text message…and my husband thought the task too daunting to just rattle off 10 songs. As he says, “I really need to think about that.” So, his choices will come later…much later – something for the next run.
So, here’s the 3/15/08 Bill’s Challenge 5k Run Playlist:

  1. We Didn’t Start the Fire – Billy Joel (Manda)
  2. Higher Ground – Stevie Wonder (Ruth)
  3. We’re Not Gonna Take It – Twisted Sister (Sarah)
  4. The Scientist – Coldplay (Heather)
  5. Paint it Black – Rolling Stones (Greg)
  6. Hotel California – Eagles (Rebecca)
  7. These Are Days – 10,000 Maniacs (ME 🙂 )music

My third motive for asking for music was to discover new music. I have some really, really creative people in my life and I am always looking for new stuff to listen to. I love the process of discovery, especially when the education comes from my friends. So, thank you, thank you, thank you for chiming in!

The Music Game

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I have a proposition to make. I’m exploring the idea of running on emotion. Right now I’m running by heartbeat. Bass and drums, bass and drums. Driving beats that match footfall. “Last night” I ran to Paint It Black five times because it got me where I wanted to go. That’s nice and all, but I want more. I need more. I found that I get more “fired up”, more “pumped” to run when there is a strong emotion behind it. Does that make sense? I’m looking to explore the idea of running angry (since I have so much of it, naturally), running happy, running with purpose. I’m thinking running angry will be a good substitute for energy since I’m less likely to have a surplus of that thing called energy, ha!  ipod
Last night I was discussing the “angry” songs with kisa. I think he was surprised to hear Gravedigger by Dave Matthews is on the list, but when he asked “1940 to 1992?” I knew he understood completely. It’s the line that gets me every single time. What’s The Matter Here? by 10,000 Maniacs goes without saying. How could any song about child abuse not get you pissed off? Uncomfortable by sirsy is another great one.

So here’s a question for you: if you could pick 10 songs; 10 all-time favorite, YOUR greatest songs ever, what would they be? How about if there were rules attached like one had to be from the 1980s (‘cuz I’m an ’80s child), one had to be a love song, one had to be personal (for whatever the reason), and one had to outside your comfort zone. Could you pick 10 and only 10? If you can do it, lemme have ’em!

Here’s my all-time 10 (don’t laugh)ipods

  1. These are Days ~10,000 maniacs
  2. Take Me To the Top ~ Loverboy
  3. Paint it Black ~ Rolling Stones
  4. Bulls on Parade ~ Rage Against the Machine
  5. Holiday ~ Scorpions
  6. Please Let Me Be ~ sirsy
  7. Thick as Thieves ~ Natalie Merchant
  8. Pretty Polly/Diver Boy ~ traditional murder ballads
  9. Grace is Gone ~ Dave Matthews Band
  10. Island Woman ~ the Merrymen

I think it’s pretty obvious where my inspirations are hiding. 80s song, love song, personal song, out-of-comfort-zone song. They’re all there. Those of you who know me will be able to spot them in a second. I doubt there will be any surprises. Your turn.

Just Plain Poppi

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IMG_0644My husband’s screen name is Poppi. He wears his hair in two Space Oddity pigtails on top of his head and a tight, black skull tee shirt that shows off his navel and the twins. He sneers at the crowd and jumps around a lot. He looks hot…for a girl. I’m talking about his persona in the game Rock Band. I’m not sure if he plays bass or lead because all guitars look the same with Rock Band. But, but, but, he’s super cool. IMG_0636I wanna be him. If only to be that cool wearing the clothes. When he goes on tour, playing places like Los Angeles or Tokyo, he earns threads for his closet. Big chunky boots, fishnet stockings with safety pins, short army fatigue skirts, hip-hugger tight glitter jeans, big hoop earrings, metal tees with strategically placed holes, and metal studded wrist bands. He has a whole closet full of cool clothes. Rocker outfits. Really cool outfits only really cool people can wear.
I wanna be Poppi but, I’m out of my league.IMG_0637x

Motley Crue Mantra

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Captured
I am homesick. There. I said it. Home. Sick. Sick for Home. Home. Home. There’s not a soul alive who can connect the dots and understand where I’m coming from right now. This ache started slower than slow. So slow I didn’t even notice it until now. Where I want to be isn’t a location on a map. Doesn’t have coordinates to guide anyone anywhere, especially me. I couldn’t explain it if I tried. I can’t, so I won’t.
After a Sunday conversation with my mother I felt the stars start to align. The universe started to right itself, because that same day someone else said “Let’s go to The Island this summer.” Kisa looked at me and smiled. That was coincidence enough. I couldn’t have dropped all other plans fast enough – even if I tried. Doesn’t matter what was on my plate, what had priority previously. All bets are off at the mention of home home home. In the case of San Diego, well, let’s just say that’s not taking up so much of my plate anymore…kinda pushed to one side…but we’re still going.

Now we have a house lined up. The dates are set, the check is set to be in the mail. I can already picture the porch. I get dibs on the hammock. A great sunset and even better glass of redred wine. Mine, all mine. Let’s have a feast of laughter. Feed me lobster on the rocks. After I’ve had my fill then, and only then, rock me to sleep by the salt salt sea. I’m ready. I’m on my way, home sweet home.

March Is…

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March is my month of hope. Hope for an early spring. Hope for brighter days. From childhood I remember a felt banner my mother had hanging on our chimney. It said something like “hope perches in the soul and sings and never stops at all. ~Emily Dickinson” Obviously abreviated from the longer poem…But, of course, when I think of the word Hope I think of one of my all time favorite movies, Shawshank Redemption. Morgan narrates the ending, talking about hope for his friend and ultimately, the whole point of the movie, hope for himself (something he didn’t have but needed to find within himself).
But, anyway, I digress. I’m here to talk about March’s list of books and the hope of finishing the list for this month.
March is:

  • The month Ohio became a state (reading The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison)
  • The month Florida became a state (reading Carter Clay by Elizabeth Evans)
  • The month Nebraska became a state (reading Dalva by Jim Harrison)
  • Russell Banks’ birthday (reading Continental Drift)

I have been chosen for one LibraryThing Early Review book:

  • Wrack & Ruin by Don Lee

February Was…

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I can’t believe I’m writing the February Was blog already! Where did the month go? Here’s the rundown on how reading part of the month went:

For LibraryThing:

  • The Jerusalem Diet by Judith Besserman
  • Dancing to Almendra by Mayra Montero
  • The Translator by Daoud Hari

For BookLust:

  • American Century by Harold Evans (finished)
  • His Excellency by Joseph Ellis (finished)
  • Defiant Hero by Suzanne Brockmann (finished)
  • Baby Sister for Frances by Russell Hobart (finished)
  • Great Expectations by Charles Dickens (finished)
  • Bright Young Things by (not read – didn’t get it in time. Save for next February)
  • Bridget Jones’s Diary by (added thanks to a friend)

For myself:

  • Sole Sisters by (gift from a friend)

So, a total of ten books. I have to say Great Expectations was probably my favorite of the Lust books while The Translator was my favorite Early Review book.

Don’t Get Out Much

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I’m a snob when it comes to some sites and my active “participation” (for lack of a better word). Take Flickr for example. I don’t peruse any other pictures except my friends. Aside from that I don’t search for much except pics of my hometown. Looking at someone else’s holiday doesn’t interest me unless I recognize the place. I rarely comment on other people’s snapshots and I don’t belong to many “groups” or place myself on any maps.

Then, there’s that Library Thingy. People have tagged my library as “interesting” and have invited me to become a member of different groups. I’m flattered by the interest and I always accept the group invitations. Maybe I shouldn’t. Maybe I shouldn’t be flattered because I don’t seek out interesting libraries of others. Maybe I shouldn’t accept invitations to join groups because I never take part in their discussions. I’m like the silent partner. I’m there but I never contribute. Truthfully, I’m waiting for the moderators to kick me out for lack of conversation…or something.

Same goes for myspace. I got a space. Got my picture and my profile and everything…even got “my” song. Except the whole thing’s private. No one can see it unless you’re already a “friend.” I don’t seek out comments, messages, profiles, pictures of people I don’t know, or think I might know, or even the ones I think I want to get to know. I occasionally return messages to my “friends” and pray they didn’t take it personally if I didn’t leave them a glittering “love ya lots” comment on Valentine’s Day. I’m just not that into it.

With all of these sites here’s what happens: I log in, I do my thing and I log back out again.
But. But, I have to tell you about this”revelation” I had. It happened here, on WordPressSpace and it involves my sudden, yet rewarding, participation. To be honest, I think I have a total of four friends who actively blog on this site. No, I take that back. Make that two friends because two left. Wait. One friend had more than one blog. Does that count? Nevermind…Anyway, my “blog surfer” page was looking a little anemic so I decided, for the first time ever, I would use that little arrow on the top righthand side of my blog. You know, the “go to next random blog” feature. I think I arrowed past four or five “god is great” blogs, three or four “watch my kid grow” blogs, at least eight political blahblahblah blogs, two or three knitting blogs (and here I almost stopped until I realized how hardcore these knit nuts really are), until finally I found writing so amazing I stopped to hang out, even scrolling back through the archives. Inspirational stuff. I have to say it, I love the way this person writes. Absolutely love it. I haven’t had the guts to find out if its a him or her who has so much talent, but you can bet I added this mystery to my blog surfer.
For once I explored outside my page, my involvement with a site. In return I found something rewarding. I should get out more often!

ps~ since writing this I have added another blog onto my list of interesting. I took my own advice and found a funny stranger.

Lining It Up

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Now&ZenYoga

(Now & Zen Yoga: photo by Chris Szarek)

Back when I was training for the LLS Alton Bay half I was striving for The Trinity: a good running plan, a good eating plan and a good yoga plan. I’m one of those nutty people that earnestly believes that all these things go together. Especially yoga and running – I’m convinced they go hand in hand. Think about it. Let’s take the run first. Some people say a good run is mind-clearing. Others say it’s a good chance to relax. Okay – so the “relax” factor might be stretching it in terms of physical, but think about it from the mental for just a sec. I don’t know about you, but when I run, there is a cadence to my breathing – one deep count in, two long counts out. Slow & steady with the mantra “must beat cancer” right behind it. There is a rhythm to my running that parallels my practice in yoga.

Now let’s move onto a good yoga session and how it relates to a good run. Tight hamstrings, tight hips, tight anything is bad, bad, bad for running so… what better way to stretch it all out than with a session of yoga? Go on any running site (take Runner’s World, for example). I bet there is an article or two (at the very least) about good stretching. The Y word might even be thrown around a little. I know for a fact Runner’s World has a video of three yoga moves designed to free the hips, loosen the quads and stretch the calves.

My point of all this preaching is not to get runners to become yogis or vise versa. My point is all about me, myself and moi, actually. I wanted to outwardly vent about lining it up – the yoga, the running & the eating well. Only now I’ve added a fourth component so I’ll have to rename the Trinity as the Fantastic Four: running, yoga, eating well and…Hello Mr. Bowflex – strength training!

Bill, My First (not)

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CancerI sent in my registration today. It’s in the mail which means there is no turning back now…unless I want to commit a federal offense. I’m committed alright! Committed to the run. Bill, your challenge will be my first even though it’s your third. No. That’s not entirely true. I’ve run one other 5K in my life. Just as I’ve only run one other race besides that. So, come to think of it, your third annual challenge is technically my third race ever. Go figure.
March 15th. Mark my calendar in red. I signed up. I paid to play.
Here’s the deal: Look Park – twice. 8am. Bill’s Challenge III is sponsored by Cancer Connection. Bill was CC’s first client. He was so involved in Cancer Connection that after his death the 5K challenge was created in his honor. Somehow I missed the 2006 & 2007 challenges but thanks to my father-in-law, hello challenge 2008, here I come.

Here’s my deal. I am not running for personal time. I could care less about beating anyone else (least of all myself). I run to fight cancer, honor someone special, raise awareness for issues like domestic abuse, bring places like Darfur into focus…I could go on. I run to help. Always have, always will. If I’m not moving my feet for something good, it’s not worth doing. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, show me the cause and I’ll find the fight.

Sole Sisters (for Sarah)

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0740757113_01__sx140_sclzzzzzzz_.jpgLin, Jennifer and Susan Warner. Sole Sisters: Stories of Women and Running. Kansas City: Andrews McMeel, 2006.

Here’s what I wrote on LibraryThing:
This is a book of inspirational stories about women running together, women running for recovery, women running for themselves. From personal goals of fighting cancer to group goals of running as a centipede in a marathon, every story comes together with humor and poignancy. There is the woman running to celebrate health and the one who runs to honor loss. Every woman has a reason for running and this book illustrates that point.

Yes, there is definitely going to be a definite split between LT blogs and what I put here. I think I explained that one well enough already.

My favorite lines:
“If I wanted to take orders from a man I would have married one” (p 12).
“She walks with a slight hitch, but she still lifts weights and runs 35 miles a week, just for herself” (p 14). Are you doing the math, people? That would be 5 miles a DAY, or 8.5 miles every other.
“The event was apologetically girly” (p 25). Never apologize for what you are.
“I ran to keep my heart beating” (p 59).
If you take that first step, do everything in your power to also take that last step” (p 92).

I read this because of Sarah. Thanks to her, it was the first gentle nudge towards getting back to running. I needed the nudge. I hope she doesn’t mind that I left it for another friend – to inspire & motivate.