Tag: leisure

Wintering

gr4c5Leave a comment

May, Katherine. Wintering: the Power of Reset and Retreat in Difficult Times. Riverhead Books, 2020.

I feel like this book comes from a place of privilege. How many of us can safely leave employment and snuggle into a season of wintering? I learned to manage my expectations in regards to what I am hoping to “get” out of reading Wintering. I found myself asking what is the difference between an entertaining story and one from which you are supposed to greatly benefit? I want to call Wintering a beautifully written memoir with a message and leave it at that. To think there is a self-help promise was almost too much to ask. Otherwise, if I don’t just call it a memoir, Wintering will be nothing more than a book with an identity crisis. Self-help or self-story? More of the latter is my honest opinion. It is a memoir about navigating a difficult season, if you take wintering in the literal sense.

Lines I liked, “But then, that’s what grief is – a yearning for that one last moment of contact that would settle everything” (p 60), “Even at the ripe old age of forty-one, I’m shy about asking if anyone’s free, lest I make myself look unpopular” (p 129), and my favorite, “My blood sparkled in my veins” (p 180).

A few comments about the favorite quotes. Everyone asked, if you had one more moment with a loved one, what would you say? It’s as if the questioner knows the answer to solving the mystery of regret is to have that one last moment of contact. What is wrong with not having anywhere to go (and no one to ask)? And lastly, I was a member of the Polar Bear Club in my high school days. We didn’t swim year round, but we did jump in Songo pond every spring, just after the thaw.

Setlist: ABBA, “Silent Night”, and “Wichita Lineman”.

Barlowe’s Guide to Fantasy

gr4c5Leave a comment

Barlowe, Wayne Douglas. Barlowe’s Guide to Fantasy: Great Heroes and Bizarre Beings from Imaginative Literature. Harper Prism, 1996.

Reason read: this was a very short read that satisfied two categories of the Portland Public Library Reading challenge for 2023. I needed a book under 150 pages and a book with a cryptid or mythological being as a character.

I think a more accurate title for this book would have been Barlowe’s Guide to Fifty Fantastic Heroes and Bizarre Beings in Fantasy. Too long? Okay, we can drop the “in fantasy” because it is kind of redundant. Seriously, I did not find this to be a guide to the genre of fantasy, but more of a who’s who of popular characters from authors such as Peter S. Beagle, Robert Jordan, Clive Barker, and Stephen Donaldson. The illustrations of insects, monsters, dragons, beasts, unicorns, and the whatnot are truly beautiful. From fashion to faces, each creature comes alive in Barlowe’s guide. I imagined Barlowe pouring over every descriptive element of each creature in order to get features, costumes, and weapons as accurate as possible. Even though the list of characters is short (there are only fifty), this must-read for fantasy readers of all ages.

Confessional: There is a book from my childhood that I like better. I still have it. It’s called Fantastic People: Magical Races of Myth and Legend by Allan Scott and Michael Scott Rohan. It includes chapters on dragons, trolls, vampires, witches, demons, and more.

Author fact: besides being an illustrator, Barlowe is an author.

Book trivia: Barlowe’s Guide to Fantasy was coauthored by Neil Duskis.

Demon Copperhead

gr4c5Leave a comment

Kingsolver, Barbara. Demon Copperhead. Harper Collins, 2022.

Reason read: Kisa gave me this book for my birthday.

Be forewarned. The language of Demon Copperhead is sandpaper rough. There is no romantic words to describe the life of Damon, aka Demon Copperhead. His life is harsh, cruel, and ugly. Like a horrible tasting medicine or a poison akin to chemotherapy, I had to sip the chapters in small increments. Big gulps of heartbreak in paragraph form would surely kill me. And believe me, there were many moments where my eyes couldn’t take in the sentences of pain. Demon is a child with a life from hell, yet completely believable and all too common. Born to a mother addicted to drugs, bounced around from place to place, he finally ends up with a grandmother who changes his life. She doesn’t approve of men living in her house, but she knows someone who will not only take him in, but make him a star. A football star, that is. Bad luck seems to follow Demon wherever he goes. If his life isn’t transient and temporary, it is translucent and tenuous. There is never a moment when I can breathe easy for a boy in the poverty stricken, opioid laden rural south.
I am not proud of the way I minced gingerly through the early chapters of Demon Copperhead as if I were on a sharp rock beach in baby-tender bare feet. But, like a hard won marathon, I would gladly read it again and again.

Lines I loved, “It can thrill a person senseless” (p 129). “The moral of his story was how you never know the size of hurt that’s in people’s hearts, or what they’re liable to do about it, given the chance” (p -).

Book trivia: Demon Copperhead is dedicated to the survivors and is an Oprah Book. Updated to add: and it just won a Pulitzer!

Author fact: Social media has changed the way of the world. Thanks to Instagram, I was able to follow Kingsolver’s writing journey including publication, press, and book tour. It felt a little voyeuristic to pull back the curtain on a process that traditionally is hidden from the public eye, but I am grateful my favorite author chose to be so transparent with her craft.

Playlist: “Amazing Grace”, Avril Lavigne, “Beautiful Mess”, Beastie Boys, Bee Gees, Britney Spears, Brooks and Dunn, Carrie Underwood, Christina Aguilera’s “Dirrty”, Destiny’s Child, Dolly Parton, Eddie Rabbit, “Electric Slide”, Elvis, Eminem, Garth Brooks, “I Have Joy Like a Fountain in My Soul”, Ice-Cube, “It’s Gonna Be Me”, Jay-Z, Ja Rule’s “Always on Time”, Jay-Z, Kathy Mattea, LeAnn Rimes’s “Can’t Fight the Moonlight”, Loretta Lynn, “Macarena”, Mariah Carey, Michael Jackson, Nas, P!nk, Prince, Reba McIntyre, Rosanne Cash, Scarface, Snoop Dogg, Shania Twain’s “You’re Still the One”, “Song Cry”, Spice Girls, “This Little Light of Mine”, “Thong Song”, Tommy Cochran’s “Life Happened”, Tupac, and Willie Nelson.

Lessons in Chemistry

gr4c5Leave a comment

Garmus, Bonnie. Lessons in Chemistry. Read by Amanda Raison. AudioBook, 2022.

Reason read: while on a boat ride a friend suggested this book.

Preface: I honestly feel Lessons in Chemistry would be more relatable if everyone read a little Betty Friedan or Marilyn French beforehand. Friedan was a feminist who published The Feminine Mystique in the early 1960s and French came later with The Women’s Room. Both books articulate the feminist movement around the same time as Lessons in Chemistry. Elizabeth Zott is an uncompromising, quirky, brilliant chemist. Because this is the late 1950s, she can’t taken seriously as a scientist. She is a woman after all, and all women belong in the kitchen. Which, ironically, is where Zott ends up making her initial mark on society. This is a story about how your past can shape your future. Elizabeth is born to religious charlatan parents. Fraudulent scam artists. From this embarrassing upbringing Elizabeth promises to always be truthful to her illegitimate child. And speaking of Mad, I loved Zott’s precocious child who was named after the cookies from Proust’s Remembrance of Thing Past. My favorite character, and probably the best character is 6:30, the remarkable dog who understands nearly 1,000 words in the English language. Lessons in Chemistry is fun. Don’t overanalyze it. Have a good time with it. And if you listen to the audio version, try to ignore Raison’s weird accent for one of the characters.

As an aside, I just finished reading Proust’s romans-flueve and had to laugh when Mad wondered about Krakatoa and if it would erupt again anytime soon. I, too, am reading about Krakatoa.

Author fact: Garmus took all her chemistry knowledge from a 1950s textbook in order to have complete accuracy for the time period.

Book trivia: I just learned Lessons in Chemistry will be a television series this fall. Interesting. Will I watch? Of course I will.

Playlist: Frank Sinatra and “Keep On the Sunny Side of Life”.

Everything All at Once

gr4c5Leave a comment

Catudal, Steph. Everything All at Once. Harper Collins, 2023.

Reason read: Team Rivs!

Celebrity is a weird thing. I first learned of Tommy “Rivs” Puzey when my husband bought me a new treadmill and it came with a free subscription to some training thing called iFit, a catalog of pre-recorded training/workout videos. I was a once-upon-a-time long distance runner, sidelined by injury and in desperate need of a comeback. Running was my therapy, truly the only way I could clear the mental fog caused by the everyday world that could cloud my wellbeing. One of my first workouts was with a strange, very tall, bearded man who walked and ran on tiptoe and called himself Rivs. He always wore a hat, tripped a lot and had many sayings that would soon become mantras (don’t get dead being one of my favorites). In addition to giving great advice about getting back into running, Rivs talked geology, anthropology, architecture, physiology, linguistics and history like a soft-spoken nutty professor. He couldn’t run by a plant without naming it or sometimes tasting it. I learned more about Portugal by running “with” Rivs than had I been there with a flag-yielding group tour guide. Aside from his didactic nature, I couldn’t help but be drawn in by Rivs; a guy who tries to eat an unripe olive straight from the tree (bitter!), or licks rocks to taste for salt, or is humble enough to not edit out the part when he falls on his ass while running down a steep hill. (Stay vertical!) Kind and considerate. In one session, calling himself rude, he actually apologized for eating a persimmon he knew his viewers could not taste. Who does that? I’m sure I’m not alone when I say I tried to finish every series Rivs shot (except Japan eludes me to this day). So, when I got the news Rivs was deathly ill (good old Instagram) I was floored. Like millions of other avid fans, I followed his case and condition as best as social media would allow. Once he was well enough to reach out to the world, we all, from every corner of the earth, anxiously awaited the words “not today.” We willed the words Not Today to show up every. single. day. I know I would feel a sense of despair when a few days would go by without those two simple words that held so much weight. I found myself praying for a complete stranger. And I am one of the faithless.
Then came Steph. Beautifully broken but brave Steph. As his wife, she became the lifeline for us Rivs fanatics. Team Rivs. She filled us in on treatments and prognosis. Her words were the balm despite the potential for permanent bruising. I fell in love with her lyrical fragility. Her words were at once stark and orchestral. A single cello note held low and sweet in orchestral medical chaos.
But, oh how I digress. Steph’s book, Everything All at Once, is what I’m here to talk about.

Reading Everything All at Once, it is as if Steph Catudal takes off all of her clothes, stands before you, and shamelessly points out every emotional battle scar she has ever acquired over the years. In the vehicle that is Everything all At Once and without fear she describes the historic places where her childhood cut and coming of age left invisible burn marks. With total honesty she appears to leave nothing out. The rage, the rebellion, the overwhelming urge to self-destruct. She courageously shows you her biggest wound: how she coped with the pain of losing her father to cancer. She embraced drug-fueled recklessness as a mechanism to forget; a secret seething rage. She didn’t know who she was without the destructive behavior of addiction. Her healing is a story in itself but wait, there is more. Her youth is only a preface to a bigger disaster of the heart. When her husband of twelve years develops a cancer so rare only ten other people had its diagnosis (and didn’t survive), Steph acquires the ultimate damaging scar only love can inflict. He is expected to die. How many times can medical professionals and hospital chaplains tell you this before you believe it? Expect it? Steph had to wish end of life in order to be in the same hospital room as her husband. I don’t want to spoil the rest of the book. I spent way more time explaining its importance than reviewing it. In a nutshell, Steph is a rare bird, rising from the ashes of a past that should have killed her. Instead, she emerges stronger, more resilient, and dare I say, even more badass?

As an aside: as soon as I read these words from Steph, I knew I wasn’t crazy for having a connection to Rivs, a complete stranger: “Once Rivs let you in, it was almost impossible not to love him. To not be changed by him.” I want to tell Steph this: you don’t have to be let in. You don’t have to know Rivs at all. You can be a stranger, a nameless and faceless fan on a treadmill, listening to him babble on about bitter olives and basalt tile and it will have an inexplicable impact on your life. Losing weight, trying to get fit, recovering from illness, striving for mental health, keeping the demons at bay. Whatever the reason for getting on the treadmill, it’s personal. Rivs somehow reaches through the technology with humble grace and holds you up, keeps you going. Eyes Up. Without telling you he tells you; you are not alone.

Playlist: Pink Floyd’s “Comfortably Numb” and Mason Jennings

Broken Soul

gr4c5Leave a comment

Krompinger, Keith. Broken Soul. Archway Publishing, 2023.

Reason read: someone practically threw this at me and dared me to read it.

Very. Dramatic. Language. I dare you to count the number of pages that do NOT include references to violence, sex, drugs, devils or demons. You will lose count because if someone isn’t being tortured or raped, he or she is dying a very violent (and very graphic) death. But, wait. There’s more. The women have lots of crimson hair, they must be undressed and stared at for a little while before they are “sexually raped”, tortured, and finally put out of their misery with a brutal murder. Oh wait. I forgot to mention the cannibalism. People being eaten alive on some strange Caribbean island.
Unfortunately, the violence is laid on so thick there is very little character development. As each person met a horrible fate, I didn’t care. Go ahead. Dress the women in weird outfits before painting their bodies with symbols, raping them and then eating them alive, body part by body part. I shrugged off the rape and torture as if was a breakfast scene with pancakes and eggs. I didn’t know any victim well enough to want them to live. Even when someone had their jugular bitten out, I shrugged with indifference. I couldn’t tell you the plot if I tried other than to say some guy is haunted by his wife’s murder. He is being called to revenge by a demon (or something with red eyes in the mirror) while his teenage daughter has her own coping mechanisms with drugs.

Here are my questions: there is a scene when the “good guys” enter a building with guns ablazing. They kill four people with a double barreled shotgun, but afterwards two people are heard talking upstairs. Are those people deaf? Didn’t they hear the blasts? Wouldn’t they be yelling or running or yelling while running?

Is it normal for someone to rush to a crime scene with enthusiasm? Cops are fueled by adrenaline, yes. But enthusiasm?

Do the women have mirrors in their jungle captivity? Because they all seem to know about the paint marked on their faces.

Poison Heart Death Club. Is that anything like Lonely Hearts Club Band?

I don’t really understand the timeline: 10/12/10 5am, 3:30am, 11:45am. 11/8/05 11:23pm, 2:45pm, 6:24pm. Is this still 11/8/05? The hours ticking by down give me a sense of suspense, but this timeline is all over the place. I lost track.

How often do you hear someone say the word ravished?

What is a Kailua drink?

Why “parts of her heart” in her mouth? Why not her whole heart stuffed in her mouth and only parts could be seen?

The characters do a lot of smirking no matter what the situation.

Confessional: I left Broken Soul in a recycling bin in New York City.

Let Me In

gr4c5Leave a comment

Lindqvist, John Ajvide. Let Me In. Translated by Ebba Segerberg. Thomas Dunne Books, 2007.

Reason read: Mr. Nash

Admittedly, it took me a few pages to get into Let Me In. Once I fell in love with Oskar and Eli I couldn’t get enough of their story. Being a twelve year old sensitive boy, Oskar is the subject of daily bullying at school. He dreams of murderous revenge far beyond his sad and lonely years. At night he takes a hunting knife into the woods and repeatedly stabs trees, imagining the soft and penetrable flesh of his school yard enemies. Meanwhile, Eli is a mystery. With a strange way of speaking and no history to speak of, Eli fascinates Oskar to the point of obsession. He finds himself in love with a strange girl who only comes out at night, repeatedly says she neither a girl nor boy, and can solve puzzles she has never seen before in the blink of an eye. Who is she? Then the murders begin. Gruesome and strange, victims are drained of blood. Is Eli to blame?
A running theme through Let Me In is the absence of father figures. Eli has a fake father. Tommy has a fake step-father. Oskar’s dad has divorced his mom and is living an alcohol-soaked life outside of town. I wanted to pay attention to the mothers for I hoped they would be the unspoken heroes of Let Me In.
Not so much.
As an aside, I appreciated the literary references of Plato, Dante, Pyramus, Thisbe, and King Minos.

As another aside, I’ve never really paid attention to the traits of vampires, so Let Me In taught me a lot. The manner of speech, how quickly they can solve puzzles, the aversion to light and potential for spontaneous combustion, their physical strength and dexterity, the need to be invited to enter a residence, how they can be killed with a stake through the heart, and of course, the constant need for “food”, for blood. As yet another aside, I never considered the quality of the blood a vampire must consume. Someone on drugs could cause an overdose and “Blood from the dead was worthless, harmful even” (p 126).

Quotes to quote, “But Eli was a terrible monster who ate beautiful maidens for lunch and she was the one he would have to fight” (p 211).

Author fact: Lindqvist has been called Sweden’s Stephen King.

Book trivia: Let Me In was also a movie in 2010. All the characters have different names, but the story is essentially the same. Guess what? I haven’t seen it yet. Let Me In was also published under the title Let the Right One In.

Playlist: Alice Tegner, Kiss, Iron Maiden, Gene Simmons, “The Internationale”, “We Come Unto Jerusalem”, Morrissey’s “The Last of the Famous International Playboys”, “Beth”, “Can’t Help Falling in Love”, Blessed Be”, Hallelujah”, “Joy to the World”,

We Need To Talk

gr4c5Leave a comment

Headlee, Celeste. We Need To Talk: How to Have Conversations That Matter. Harper, 2017.

Reason read: a colleague came back from a conference with a bunch of books. What’s better than free books?

This is a great little book full of common sense advice about how to be a better conversationalist. It is not necessarily geared towards getting ahead in the corporate world, but it is helpful. Written by a “human nature expert” Headlee offers practical tips for listening and speaking with meaning. I appreciated the reminders about repeating oneself and using negative language. Even though she did not provide much information I haven’t heard before I would like to check out her TED talk. Out of all of the self help books on communication I’ve read, We Need to Talk was the most enjoyable.

Author fact: Headlee is cohost of a PBS television show called Retro Report.

Book trivia: Headless includes some tips on meditation.

Playlist: Barenaked Ladies, Michael Jackson, Verdi, Pucci, Mozart, and Wagner.

Limitless

gr4c5Leave a comment

Otting, Laura Gassner. Limitless: How to Ignore Everybody, Carve Yor Own Path and Live

Reason read: work

The emphasis of Limitless is this: do not be afraid to start your own business; do not be scared to leave the rat race of working for someone else; learn how to want to be your own boss. Most of the examples in Limitless are of high powered executives and/or people who can afford (literally) to take big risks. You never hear about the McDonald’s burger flipper who cashes it all in to open a soap store. Case in point – the lawyer who took an 80% pay cut to do something she loved. The other lawyer who quit her thriving practice to start a chocolate company in her kitchen (guess it wasn’t a galley kitchen with a one-burner stove). How many of us are called to lead an expedition to Mount Everest while working at Goldman Sachs? The example of the veterinarian who went from in-clinic appointments to home visits was the first real down-to-earth example with which I connected. That was a career adjustment I could get behind. Another observation: I would argue that gig-economy only works if a), you stored up enough reserves to see you through while you are trying to find your calling and b), you have a family network willing to support you during the paycheck gaps or c), you cobble together enough jobs to pay the bills without interruption.
The mantra is finding purpose. What if you don’t know your purpose so you wouldn’t recognize it if you saw it? The trick is to harness ambition. What if you have no idea how to do that? Of course the book ends with a bonus quiz, but in order to see the results or learn anything from them, you have to log into a website.

Book trivia: Limitless includes a list of books to read.

Always Eat Left Handed

gr4c5Leave a comment

Bhargava, Rohit. Always Eat Left Handed:… and Other Secrets for Killing It at Work and In Real Life. IdeaPress, 2018.

Reason read: this was a work recommendation. Maybe because I am left handed?

Chapter titles are catchy like “Start Smoking.” He doesn’t literally mean start an unhealthy habit to get ahead in your career (although he started smoking for just that reason). He means be willing to take risks. He reminded me of the headmaster at my boarding school. His mantra was Take Risks, Take Risks. That has always stuck with me although I suck at heeding that advice. What if I am a healthy mix of taking and abstaining?
Chapters are punctuated with white illustrations on a black background. They are simple drawings on even simpler objects: an airplane window, a watch, toast with butter, an ipod playing music, a CV, Sharpie, jeans pocket, cauliflower, a high-heeled shoe, a pair of lips, a violin, a pile of books, a suitcase, cigarette, Lego, heart, eye crying, a string tied around a finger, Maybe this is a spoiler, but here are the corresponding lessons: choose your destiny, read books like choosing music for a playlist, read only what is important to you, take risks (did I already mention that?), and so on.

Playlist: Lady Gaga, Beyoncé, Ed Sheeran,

Blue Plate

gr4c5Leave a comment

Christensen, Kate. Blue Plate Special: an Autobiography of My Appetites. Anchor Books, 2013.

Reason read: this was a gift from my sister. I think I have said it before, but I will say it again. I read everything she sends my way.

Truth. The tongue can hold memories longer than the heart; sometimes even longer than the mind. Childhood delicacies like soft boiled eggs and Tapioca pudding could bring author Kate Christensen back to six years old, much the same way a steaming hot bowl of Cream of Wheat with melting swirls of butter and sparkling brown sugar still can for me in my middle age. The thread of food is woven in and out of Christensen’s story, sometimes as a integral character and other times as supporting cast, pivotal moments are remembered as meals.
I have a lot in common with Kate. I can remember feeling exactly like her when, at seven years old, the best present in the world was to have a space, separate from the house, in which to hide from the world; a place to call my own. Another similarity was when she shared that she salivated at the thought of the breakfasts in Little House on the Prairie. I, too, had food envy.
There were a lot of unexpected aha moments while reading Blue Plate. It is strange how the trauma of events in childhood can inform decisions in adulthood without us knowing how or why.

Quote I really liked, “Now and again he paused, a venerable, wheezing monument, and the audience could not have told whether he was in pain, asleep, swimming, about to spawn, or merely taking a breath” (p 49).

Playlist: Artie Shaw, Anita O’Day, Alison Krauss, Anne Murray, Blood Sweat and Tears, the Beatles, Benny Goodman, Bach, Bee Gees, Bob Marley, Chicago, Cat Stevens, the Clash, Carole King’s “Tapestry”, the Dead, Donna Summer, Elton John, Ella Fitzgerald, Elvis Costello, the Eagles, Fleetwood Mac’s “Rumours”, Flying Cowboys, “I am Woman” by Helen Reddy, “Home in Oasadena”, Jayhawks, Joan Baez, Joan Armatrading, Led Zeppelin, “A Love Supreme”, Mingus, Monk, “Moonshiner”, Mozart’s “Requiem Mass” and “Laudate Dominum”, the O’ Jays, Olivia Newton-John, Paul McCartney, Pink Floyd’s “Great Gig in the Sky”, Rickie Lee Jones, Rolling Stones, Supertramp, the Specials, Sly & the Family Stone, Stravinsky’s “Rite of Spring”, Schubert’s “C Major Quartet”, “Star of the County Down”, “Top of the World”, Talking Heads, Vassar Clements, Wings, and War.

Author fact: Christensen has written a bunch of stuff and here is the really cool part. I was introduced to her writing thanks to my sister. What I have come to realize is that I have two other novels on my Challenge list. I will be reading In the Drink and Jeremy Thrane. Because I am a geek about schedules, I am reading both books in the month of July (in honor of New York becoming a state).

Lungfish

gr4c5Leave a comment

Gillis, Meghan. Lungfish. Catapult, 2022.

Reason read: This was a Christmas gift from my sister. I read everything she sends my way.

Have you ever seen a race horse struggle to restrain its awesome power? Or a runner who can easily put the pedal to the metal, but has hold back in an effort to race smart? This is the way I felt reading Lungfish. Deceptively simple passages in incredibly short chapters made me want to speed-read; to buzz through the sentences at a hundred pages a minute. To do that would be to miss the scenery of gorgeous language flashing by. To not slow down and savor the smart language would be to deprive myself of one of the best books of the year. Yes, I know it’s only early 2023. But. But! But, that’s my prediction and I’m sticking with it.
Lungfish oozes mystery. There is a hinting of things. What is wrong with Paul? The use of the word “better” implies there is something worse. You shouldn’t think of the word ‘trickery’ that could at play, yet you do. You do. Is the narrator asking Paul to improve a behavior? Be a better person? Or is it his health? The possibility he could be better at something hangs heavy. Especially when a word like perfunctory is used to describe a kiss between two people in a relationship. Then consider the act of hiding from the law. Questioning what happens when the executor arrives. What is that all about? The narrative does not speak in linear terms, only winding and twisting innuendo, slippery as seaweed newly exposed by the outgoing tide. Early on there is an unexplained sadness that permeates the entire story, the way a thick fog will dampen a wool sweater to a newfound heaviness. You want the fog to lift, the sunshine to come streaming in, and loud laughter to break the silence.
Instead, we as readers circle the plot in a strange swaying dance, like a slow moving game of musical chairs. Only when the song comes to an abrupt halt, we grab for the final sentence and wait for the silence to end so we can read on. Careful not to slip on the seaweed of secrets.

Lines I loved, “He puts his hands on my shoulders, from behind, and I sit like a stone” (p 123). Unmoving. Unfeeling, Cold, Hard. Colorless. These are the words of a stone. Here’s another, “The box contained three sets and I’d used them all, in part because I didn’t trust the way I peed on them” (p 165). O can relate to the permeation of doubt that becomes pervasive.

Playlist: “Jumpin’ Jack Flash” by the Rolling Stones.

Digging Up Mother

gr4c5Leave a comment

Stanhope, Doug. Digging Up Mother: a Love Story. Da Capo Press, 2016.

Reason read: Do you ever feel like your life is too uptight or that you don’t laugh enough at stupid stuff? I was definitely feeling too severe and too closed minded. So when a friend practically threw Digging Up Mother on my desk, I thought to myself “Self! What the hell? Read the damn book.” Definitely not on the Lust Challenge List. Definitely not. This is my 2023 proverbial show-the-panties, thumb-the-nose, and stick-out-the-tongue moment. Deal with it.

How do you navigate the unchartered waters of assisted suicide when it is your own mother who wants to die? Stanhope compares this “adventure” of killing his mother to planning a wedding: at least you know where to start. First, take mother to your house. Second, find a boatload of alcohol…
But Digging Up Mother isn’t all about Dear Mommy Dearest. Think of it as a fast-paced memoir of how Stanhope got his start in life. But. But! But, also think of it as a love story. His mother was his biggest fan, and for many years, his best friend. She supported him through every moment of his life, whether he wanted that support or not. I think I can safely call Digging Up Mother crude and caring and, dare I say? beautiful.
P.S. I hope Bingo is well.

A line I liked, “Everything horrible in life was money in the bank on stage” (p 151). Here’s one more, “Anyone who says that suicide is never the answer hasn’t heard all of the questions” (p 179).

Author fact: Stanhope is from Worcester, MA. Right down the road from me.

Book trivia: Johnny Depp wrote the foreword. Yes, that Johnny Depp. Are you surprised?

Setlist: The Chamber Brothers’ “Time Has Come Today”, Cheap Trick, “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star”, Tom Jones’s “Delilah”, Pink Floyd’s “Mother”, “In the Flesh”, and “Nobody Home”, Suspicious Minds”, Cop Killer by Ice T., P. Diddy, Limp Bizkit, Yakety Sax”, and “You’re Too Good To Be True”. True story. When I was in grade school a friend of mine and I choreographed a dance routine to that last song. I still remember some of the moves.

All Over But the Shoutin’

gr4c5Leave a comment

Bragg, Rick. All Over But the Shoutin’ .Vintage Books, 1997.

Reason read: A friend sent this to me.

Rick Bragg needs you to understand three things about his life: One, he grew up with a strong mother. Two, his family was poorer than dirt. I don’t know what’s more poor than dirt, but Bragg will never let you forget he grew up less than dirt with words like white trash, ragged, welfare, slums, poverty, raggedy, and did I mention poor? Three, he’s southern to the core, despite moving to New York City. Maybe it’s this last point that makes it okay for him to use words like Eskimo. To be fair, we are a society becoming more and more sensitive to slights, real and perceived. But, I digress.
Bragg travels the world seeing atrocities far worse than growing up in poverty or having a delinquent dad or a drug-addled brother. His ability to tell stories from a compassionate point of view draws a great deal of attention and eventually, fame.
It is funny how when we are on the cusp of carrying on traditions from childhood we say we will do things differently than our parents. “I will not be my father. I will not be my mother.” Yet, at the same time we are just like them without trying. Bragg spent a lifetime trying not to be his father, but at the end of All Over But the Shoutin’ he is compelled to write his long-gone father a few words.

Author fact: Bragg won a Pulitzer as a reporter for the New York Times.

Book trivia: All Over But the Shoutin’ is a national best seller and has a few black and white photographs.

Playlist: Elvis, “Closer Walk with Thee”, “I’ll Fly Away”, “Boilin’ Cabbage Down”, Faron Young, Little Jimmy Dickens, Bill Monroe, Carlos Santana, Mother Maybell Carter, “Saturday in the Park”, Hank Williams, George Wallace, “Faded Love and Winter Roses”, “Dixie”, “Just As I Am”, “My Daddy’s War”, Beethoven, Johnny Horton, “Silent Night”, Eagle’s “The Long Run”, “Jesus Loves Me”, “Amazing Grace”, Tennessee Ernie Ford, and “Uncloudy Day”.

Maine in America

gr4c5Leave a comment

Belanger, Pamela J. Maine in America: American Art at the Farnsworth Art Museum. The Farnsworth Art Museum, 2000.

Reason read: a gift from a dear friend.

There is something to be said for the romance of the sea, especially when that sea is off the coast of Maine. The art of the Farnsworth is nostalgic and home all at once to me. It has been cool to learn more about my hometown. I never knew there was a failed art school on the island. Not all of the art in Maine in America focuses on the ocean or even Maine. Places like Glouster, Massachusetts and the wilderness of New Hampshire are appropriately represented. Thanks to Maine in America I think of the creation of art differently. I never thought about how artistis perferred different weathers for different sceneries and landscapes. It will be interesting to return to the Farnsworth Museum and view the art in a different way.
As an aside, I also have to wonder, where did Samuel Peter Rolt Tricott live on Monhegan? What about the Robert Henri House? I am fascinating to think there were different roads on Monhegan that are now completely obscured by overgrowth.

I have a degree of separation to Rockwell Kent besides growing up in a neighboring house. He took painting classes at Shinnecock Hills on Long Island. My grandmother has a connection to Shinnecock as well.